Is a Lab Holiday Party Too Much to Ask For?!

Dear Dora,

Is it too much to expect a holiday party from your PI- even if it’s just a lunch outing?

-TJ, graduate student

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Dear TJ,

It is not too much to expect a holiday party. In fact, most students and postdocs value group time outside the lab, because it gives them a chance to get to know each other in a social setting. PI’s frequently organize holiday parties or group lunches, but some are so busy (or antisocial), that they do not socialize with their groups. If your PI leans towards the latter category, do not push the issue. Many “orphan” groups organize their own parties, and hopefully your PI is open-minded enough to let you all have an hour off once in a while (most PI’s are, particularly around the holidays). The two most popular social options are: (1) a pot-luck party in the department or (2) a group outing to lunch. The first option can be quite fun because everyone can show off their talents, and it is more likely that a busy PI will join you. The second option takes less planning, and most people appreciate the opportunity to go out!

Remember that you do not need to wait for the holidays to come around to have a little fun. Birthdays also present great excuses to have lunch in a social setting, and they do not even require extra time commitment. After all, everyone has to eat!

If you are really ambitious and your group has a sense of adventure, you can even experiment with skiing/hiking trips. Many outdoor places offer generous discounts to students, and your university’s outdoor club probably has many suggestions. Of course, planning such a trip would be quite an endeavor considering everyone’s busy schedules, but they really do give students the opportunity to get to know each other, fostering better professional relationships.

Of course, whatever kind of outing you plan, you should always invite your PI, even if they seem busy (and possibly antisocial). Some very seemingly introverted PI’s can surprise their students with their social and athletic skills!

Dora Farkas, Ph.D. is the author “The Smart Way to Your Ph.D.:200 Secrets from 100 Graduates,” and the founder of PhDNet, an online community for graduate students and PhDs. You will find links to her book, monthly newsletters, and discussion board on her site. Send your questions to [email protected] and keep an eye out for them in an upcoming issue!

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Stay tuned for the next Dear Dora in two weeks!  In the meantime, check a few of Dora’s recent posts:

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Submit your questions to Dora at [email protected], or use the comment box below!

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